What saying yes to everything is costing you

TLDR: We’re told to say yes to every opportunity — but less really is more. Chasing everything leaves you with a graveyard of half-built bridges and no results to show for the time, energy and money you’ve poured in. Before you say yes to anything, ask why you’re doing it, whether you actually have capacity for it, and whether it’s worth the return. Then plan in focused 12-week sprints instead of nebulous 12-month goals. Stop chasing every squirrel. Focus on the one or two things that actually move your business forward.

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We are told to do all the things, to just say yes to all the opportunities that come our way. And then on the other side of things, we have the less is more, the old cliché. But actually it’s completely true. Less really is more.

As a solo business owner, you are chasing a million ideas at once. The latest marketing tactic, the client experience upgrade, the new email system, the launch funnel, the book you want to write, the offers you want to launch, and everyone who is shouting at you that you need an AI clone of yourself or you’re going to get left behind.

The problem is that when we try and do everything, when we chase all these things we’re “meant” to do, when we grab every opportunity that comes our way, we end up finishing nothing. We end up with this graveyard of half-built bridges — projects we got halfway through and then abandoned. And each unfinished project is wasted time. It’s time you don’t get back. Time where you’ve spent energy and effort and resources without the results to show for it.

The opportunity cost nobody talks about

You’ve sacrificed that time, that energy, the decisions you’ve made, the cognitive load — you’ve used it, which means you can’t use it on something else. There’s an opportunity cost. You’ve made a conscious choice, and you’ve made a sacrifice.

Of course, in business, we’re always going to make sacrifices, we’re always going to make choices. But we have to accept that when we make those choices, we are saying no to something else. So the question becomes: when I say yes to all of the things, what am I actually saying no to?

Is it my relationships? Is it time with my children? Is it my own sanity and energy, my health, my fitness? Is it the client experience we’re giving, because we’re chasing too many things and don’t have enough energy left?

For me, my family always comes before business, every time. When it’s the summer holidays, my kids come first. That means during the summer holiday period I have to adjust how I run my business — how I do my marketing, how I manage client delivery, all of it. That’s an opportunity cost. It’s a sacrifice, and it’s a conscious decision.

We cannot have our cake and eat it too. Time, energy, resources are finite. They don’t just keep producing magically — you know, whatever the abundance-and-manifest-your-dreams people will tell you. You’ve got 24 hours a day. That’s it. How you spend your time, your energy, your focus matters.

Because if you’re not laser focused on the things that are really going to drive your business forward, you are going to get pulled down every single rabbit hole that crosses your feed. The new strategy that pops up on LinkedIn. The shiny object syndrome you get when you see a coach or competitor doing something differently that seems to be working for them, so maybe you should do it too. And you end up chasing the new squirrel, and nothing gets finished — because by the time you’ve chased that squirrel down the rabbit hole (squirrels and rabbit holes, that’s a bit weird, but I’m going with it), there’s already a new squirrel going down a different rabbit hole.

What I ask myself before saying yes to anything

• Why do I think this is a good idea?
• How long is it going to take me?
• What is the actual benefit of doing it?
• Am I doing it because I feel like I should be doing it — because fear underlies it, or because I’m chasing some shiny object a guru told me to chase?
• Or is it something genuinely compelling to me, something that’s really going to make a difference to my business?

Because I know that when I start chasing “shoulds” — when I pursue something because a LinkedIn coach told me to — I probably won’t stick with it. I might get that initial spark, that initial drive, that initial push. But within a couple of weeks, it fades away.

There’s a lot of that energy on LinkedIn in September. Back-to-school energy, fresh-start energy. It happens in January too. We set off with the best of intentions, but if we haven’t really got to grips with why we’re doing the thing, why it matters to us, and how we’re going to make it happen, that initial motivation fades and we’re left without the underlying desire to keep putting in the effort.

So really ask yourself: what is this for? Why am I doing it?

Then consider your constraints

Is pursuing this particular strategy, this particular tactic, realistic given the life I’m actually living right now, within the next 12 weeks? Is it something I can manage in my workload?

I work school hours. I do not pick up the laptop in the evening. I know some people do — I don’t. I’ve been there, I’ve done it, and I’ve made a conscious decision not to do it now. My kids are older now, they’re awake till half past nine and my brain is already mushed by then.

I could, of course, follow hustle culture and work 12 hour days. But due to the law of diminishing returns, my brain doesn’t operate optimally for 12 hours. I can probably run optimally for three to four hours a day. So if I worked 12 hour days in the name of hustle, in the name of “10x-ing my goals,” sure, I’d be sitting at the computer for 12 hours — but the last eight hours would basically be pointless, because I’d be sitting there looking busy instead of actually being productive. Presenteeism versus focused productivity.

Is it actually worth it?

Once I’ve thought about whether it’s really mine, whether it’s really going to make a difference, and whether I’ve got the capacity for it, then I want to get into the nitty gritty: return on effort, return on time, return on finances. Is the impact I’m going to get out of it worth the effort going in?

Some of that you honestly can’t fairly assess until you’ve started doing it and gathered data. But you can have an initial gut feel, look at the evidence of other people doing similar things, and ask whether it fits with where you’re heading. Does it align with your values? Is the return really worth it? Is it really what you want?

Then, and only then — planning

Once I’ve answered those questions honestly, I move into the practical planning stage. How am I actually going to get this done? What systems — not tech, but ways of working — do I need in place to make it happen? Are there daily habits and actions I need to take? How am I going to reduce the friction and set up my environment to make it possible? Are there skills or knowledge I need to acquire or develop? What’s the deep work that needs to happen — the big thinking, the big implementation — and do I have the capacity for that?

So instead of chasing everything, instead of grabbing every amazing opportunity, I make focused decisions: what is actually going to move my business forward in the next 12 weeks?

Why I plan in 12-week sprints, not 12-month plans

I’ve got a long-term vision of where I’m going, but I plan in 12 week sprints. I’m a deadline dancer. I act when it’s urgent. I see time as now or not now. And the joy of 12 weeks is that I can see clearly ahead — I can actually see the weeks physically and keep track of them in my head. I know my constraints, I know my capacity, and it’s much easier to maintain momentum over 12 weeks than over a full year. I can pace myself better and get things done because every single week counts.

My 12 month plan, on the other hand, would go something like this: January, buzzing, fresh start energy. Mid-year, I’ve drifted and started doing something else. October rolls around and it’s “shit, I’ve still not done the thing, I’ve got three months left” — panic sprint at the end.

A 12 week goal helps me get focused and get things done. It’s how I ran two summits last year, how I did a research project this year, how I got fully booked in six weeks, launched my YouTube channel, and developed two year-long STEM curricula and a CPD training programme. All of it in 12 week chunks — short, sharp, focused. Not some nebulous 12 month goal I just can’t act on.

Don’t try and do all the things

You can’t do all the things. It’s just not possible to focus on a hundred cats at once. You have to focus on the one thing — or the two or three things — you’re really going to focus on.

Learning to say no, and being able to discern what to say no to, is really important. Having that boundary, knowing exactly what you’re doing, why you’re doing it, where you’re going with it, and what the benefit to your business is — that’s absolutely fundamental to building a business that’s joyful and sustainable and fun, while also being profitable.

Otherwise you get stuck in this relentless machine of constantly working, constantly pushing output, and not getting the results you want, because there’s no singular focus. You’re just working for the sake of working. And that ultimately isn’t going to get you where you want to go. If you’re trying to do everything, nothing is going to progress.

If this is you right now

If you’re thinking “oh my God, how is it <insert month> already? I’ve got a gazillion ideas and goals and none of it’s happened”

Book your Build Your Own 12 Week Sprint — a 90 minute 1:1 (or group session) where you make the decisions, get focused on one core goal and design an executable plan. No more kicking the can down the road, chasing the shiny objects or saying yes when you mean no!